Articles

To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

هذا المقال يعبر عن رأي كاتبه، ولا يعبر بالضرورة عن رأي دائرة الإفتاء العام

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Summarized Fatawaa

Is it permissible for the woman who is observing Iddah after the death of her husband to exchange calls with her relatives and husband`s family call?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
It is permissible for the woman who is observing Iddah* after death of husband to exchange calls with them; however, when she speaks to non-Mahrams , she shouldn`t be soft of speech and she should be straight to the point. This because Almighty Allah Says (What means): "O ye wives of the Prophet! Ye are not like any other women. If ye keep your duty (to Allah), then be not soft of speech, lest he in whose heart is a disease aspire (to you), but utter customary speech." [Al-Ahzaab/32]. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.
 

 [1] The iddah is a waiting period that a Muslim woman observes after the death of her husband or after a divorce. The Quran says: For those men who die amongst you and leave behind wives, they (the wives) must confine themselves (spend iddah) for four months and ten days.

I`m a university student. While I was sitting for an exam, the professor caught my fellow student cheating. I heard him telling her to hide the dossier. After the exam, he asked me to testify that I saw her cheating although I heard him telling her to hide the dossier but didn`t see her cheating. What is the ruling of Sharia on this?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of The Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
It was narrated that the Prophet (PBUH) said to a man: "Do you see the sun?" He replied: "Yes." He said: "Give witness in a similar case [which is as clear as the sun], or leave it." [Reported by Al-Baihaqhi in "Sho`ab Al-Eman" pp.10964]. Therefore, it is not permissible to testify about something that you haven`t actually seen. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.

Is it lawful or unlawful to take payment of key money?

Praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
If the lease contract has expired and the lessor refrained from renewing it, then the tenant is obliged to leave the property for nothing. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.

I work in an accounting and auditing office, and among the clients of the office are restaurants, hotels, and supermarkets that sell alcohol. Our work is limited to collecting invoices, whether purchases, sales, or expenses, and recording them in daily books. We also review income and sales taxes on behalf of these clients.

You are more knowledgeable about the nature of your work. If you see it as assisting in wrongdoing, then it is forbidden, as Allah The Exalted Says (What means): "And cooperate in righteousness and piety, but do not cooperate in sin and aggression" [Al-Ma’idah/2]. However, if your work is merely documenting the reality, then I hope there is no sin upon you. The the pious predecessors (Salaf) used to take the tithe from the traders of the People of the Book, even if it included alcohol, after knowing the value of their goods. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.