Articles

To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

هذا المقال يعبر عن رأي كاتبه، ولا يعبر بالضرورة عن رأي دائرة الإفتاء العام

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Summarized Fatawaa

Is it permissible for the person who wants to travel from the United Arab Emirates to Jordan during the day in Ramadan to break his fast before leaving his country; knowing that he had embarked on journey half an hour after dawn?

Praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds.

The person who made the intention to embark on journey after dawn must observe fast for that day, because it became an obligation on him before engaging on journey. However, if he experienced unbearable hardship while on travel, then he is permitted to break his fast, but he must make up for the missed day. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.

What is the ruling of Sharia on unregistered marriage in Jordan?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
Aishah narrated that the Messenger of Allah said: "Whichever woman married without the permission of her Wali her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid. If he entered into her, then the Mahr is for her in lieu of what he enjoyed from her private part. If they disagree, then the Sultan is the Wali for one who has no Wali." [Related by Tirmithi, Hadith No.1102]. The Prophet (Peace and blessings be upon him) also said: "There is no marriage without a guardian and two honorable witnesses." Related in [Al-Mo`jam Al-Basit for At-Tabarani, pp.6366]. Registration of the marriage contract at Islamic court is necessary for the preservation of rights and failing to do so is punishable by Jordanian Law. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best

Is Zakah(obligatory charity) due on rented property, and how is it calculated?

Zakah isn`t due on the rented property itself, but on the saved income from that property if it reached Nissab(minimum amount liable for Zakah), and a whole lunar year had lapsed over saving it.

My husband told me that he concluded our marriage with a fake name that belongs to another person, because he was sentenced. Nowadays, he brought an ID, passport and birth certificate with the his current name. What is the ruling on being married to him?

praise be to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds, and may His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all of his family and companions.

As regards being married to the person mentioned in your question: The marriage is valid so long as he was the same person your guardian concluded the marriage with, even if he changed his name i.e. if your marriage contract was concluded with the same person, since what counts regarding marriage is the persons not names. And Allah Knows Best.