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To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism......
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 13-09-2022

......To Insulate Yourself from Negative Criticism

 

Although we work a lot and hard, some people criticize us, sometimes mercilessly. However, this criticism could be just, but mostly it isn`t. Therefore, how can we protect ourselves against negative, damaging criticism?

Some say: If you want to be spared from criticism, don`t work. Some interpret this statement in the negative sense, and that is standing idly although people also criticize the inactive person as well and accuse them with laziness. The intended meaning is that you have to keep working and ignore criticism, because people will never let you be.

You will never be spared from criticism because in this life there is the envier, the hater, the lazy, the idle, and the helpless; all of whom don`t wish you success because of they are driven by ill psychological motivations.

The envier and the hater may try to imitate you to reach the same rank that you have reached, but couldn`t for some reason or that time hasn`t come yet. Therefore, instead of intensifying their efforts and working harder, they tend to undervalue your efforts and pin defects on you thinking that stigmatizing makes them look superior, but not a chance! Because of envy and hatred, they wouldn`t hesitate to assassinate your character and frame you, so ignore them and continue with your journey of success.

As for the lazy, the idle, and the helpless, each doesn`t exert the effort needed for success. Instead, they keep criticizing the success of others. For example, they start saying that so and so reached their position through favoritism, paying bribes, and selling their faith and conscience, in addition to other falsehoods. The aim is to show that you aren`t successful had it not been for luck and perverted methods, dismissing that you are a successful, self-made man. Just ignore them and carry on with your success.

This life is replete with such sick people and we may not be able to change them. However, we can deal with their negative devastating opinions by ignoring them altogether. This may be hard at first, but eventually one gets used to it.

Personally, I was saddened the first time I was criticized, and got depressed for some time. However, I remembered that the Prophets (PBUT) and the righteous were subjected to insults from their own people, but they endured and continued conveying their Message with love. They are our role model, so nowadays whenever I`m criticized-unjustly- I turn a blind eye, laugh, pray that Allah forgives that person, and declare forgiving them so that they aren`t held accountable for that criticism and punished because of me.

It doesn`t matter what they say about you, what matters is your attitude from their ability to get to your mind and nerves. Here, I remind that one should wear a protective shield made of ignoring and self-confidence to stop those devastating words from targeting one`s heart and mind causing one to die from frustration and anger.

In conclusion, water can`t cause the boat to sink unless it reaches its inside. If it doesn`t reach the inside, the boat keeps floating on the water. You should learn to be as such by preventing offensive words from reaching your soul, mind, or heart. Rather, float on them and continue your journey of success.

 

هذا المقال يعبر عن رأي كاتبه، ولا يعبر بالضرورة عن رأي دائرة الإفتاء العام

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Summarized Fatawaa

After I had prayed, I found a drop of menstrual blood and was unsure when that happened; what is the ruling on my prayer and fast?

All praise is due to Allah, peace and blessing be upon the Messenger of Allah.

Your prayer and fast are correct ,and you should not make up for them, and we ask Allah, The Almighty, to duely reward you for these acts of worship. Your menses start once you see blood because the situation remains as such unless there is certainty or predominant conjecture, as per the Fiqh maxim: "Certainty is not removed by doubt". And Allah Knows Best.

What is the ruling of Sharia on using IUD (Intrauterine device) temporarily and by mutual agreement of husband and wife?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
There is nothing wrong with this if this device is used on temporary basis and by mutual agreement of husband and wife since this issue falls into family planning, which is allowed by Sharia. However, this is provided that the device is inserted by a female doctor and that it doesn`t cause harm to the woman. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.

What is the ruling on exchanging kisses and hugs between husband and wife during the day in Ramadan?

Praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. It is disliked to kiss one`s wife during the day in Ramadan, and it is recommended to avoid that. And Allah the Almighty knows best.

Is it permissible for a father to disinherit his disobedient, alcohol consuming son and his daughter who had fled home and never returned?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
It is permissible to give heirs some money because of their being extra obedient or needy. As far as inheritance is concerned, it is to be divided after one`s death, so it had better be left to the court itself. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.