Articles

Better for Both of You than a Servant
Author : Mufti Dr. Marzooq As-Sharafat
Date Added : 05-11-2024

Better for Both of You than a Servant

 

Praise be to Allah, Lord of all the worlds. May blessings and peace be upon our master and Prophet Muhammad, his family, and all his companions.

Some people, especially women, complain about not being able to keep up with housework due to its abundance and difficulty. This is what happened with Lady Fatimah (may Allah be pleased with her) the daughter of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). She complained about the pain in her hands from using the grinding mill,[1] which had caused her hands to blister.[2] This indicates that Fatimah (may Allah be pleased with her) used to grind flour, and those who grind also knead and bake. This was part of a woman's duties in her husband's home [3].

She would also carry water until it left marks on her neck and shoulders clean the house until her clothes became dusty,[4] and stoke the cooking fire until her clothes became darkened and worn from the smoke[5]. She endured all of this, even though she was the Lady of the Women of Paradise, [6] about whom the Prophet (PBUH) said: "Fatimah is the leader of the women of Paradise." Thus, it is no surprise that such experiences happened to other women as well.

I am not here to discuss the ruling on a woman's household duties in a time when many debate this subject. It is enough to observe the example of this blessed and noble lady, the daughter of the Messenger of Allah (PBUH), who endured physical hardship from serving her home, eventually leading her to request a servant from the Prophet (PBUH).

Al-Imam Al-Bukhari recorded this hadith in several places in his collection. Ali Ibn Abi Talib (may Allah be pleased with him) said: "Fatimah came to the Prophet (PBUH) complaining about the hardship from the grinding mill, as it had worn out her hands. She had heard that he had received some slaves, but when she went to him, she did not find him. She mentioned this to Aisha, and when he arrived, Aisha informed him. The Prophet (PBUH) came to us after we had gone to bed. When we were about to get up, he said, 'Stay in your places." He then sat down between us, so close that I could feel the coolness of his feet on my chest. He said: "Shall I not tell you of something better than what you requested? When you go to bed, say "Subhanallah" (Glory be to Allah) 33 times, "Alhamdulillah" (Praise be to Allah) 33 times, and "Allahu Akbar" (Allah is Great) 34 times. This is better for you than a servant."[7]

Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) was also not spared from the strain of hard work. He once complained of pain in his chest due to heavy labor. Fatimah told him about her own exhaustion, prompting him to request a servant from the Prophet (PBUH). He said to her: "By Allah, I have drawn water [8] until I have felt pain in my chest. Go to your father and ask him for a servant." Fatimah replied: "By Allah, I have ground flour until my hands have blistered." She then approached the Prophet (PBUH), saying: "I came to greet you," and she felt too shy to ask him, so she left. When she returned, Ali asked her what she had done. She said: "I was too shy to ask him."

The Prophet (PBUH) then came to them while they were lying under their blanket, which either covered their heads, leaving their feet exposed, or covered their feet, leaving their heads uncovered. They both sat up. The Prophet said: "Stay as you are." He then sat between them and said: "Shall I tell you something better than what you requested?" They said: "Yes." He replied: "Words taught to me by Gabriel: Say "Subhanallah" ten times after each prayer, "Alhamdulillah" ten times, and "Allahu Akbar' ten times. And before you sleep, say "Subhanallah" 33 times, "Alhamdulillah" 33 times, and "Allahu Akbar" 34 times."[9]

There are many lessons in the hadith of 'Ali and Fatimah (me pleased with them), such as:

A woman who endures household duties is rewarded, and her patience with these difficulties indicates her virtue, as the Prophet (PBUH) praised this quality, saying: "My daughter, be patient, for the best women are those who benefit their families". [10]

It is permissible for a daughter to share her concerns with her father, since the Prophet (PBUH) did not object. It also shows the father's duty to advise his children, even after marriage, demonstrating his compassion and empathy for both his daughter and son-in-law by not disturbing their rest, instead gently advising them. [11]

The hadith shows that a man may enter his daughter and son-in-law’s home without permission, sit between them, and even touch them to convey closeness. In some narrations, it is mentioned that he sought permission before entering. [12]

It suggests that a noble woman is dignified in handling household duties, as Fatimah, the daughter of the Prophet (PBUH), was willing to endure these tasks for Allah's Sake and humility in worship. [13]

The hadith emphasizes asceticism and preferring the Hereafter over worldly comforts. In this regard, the Prophet (PBUH) said: "Shall I not guide you to something better than what you requested?" and guided them to remembrance instead of a servant. [14]

This hadith reflects the high status of 'Ali and Fatimah, for the Prophet (PBUH) visited in their home, did not let them stand up out of respect, and taught them what was better for them. What an honor!

This remembrance before sleep is said to alleviate physical fatigue, as the Prophet (PBUH) redirected Fatimah's complaint to this remembrance, suggesting it as a source of comfort and relief. [15]

The "goodness" mentioned in the hadith could either refer to what pertains to the Hereafter, while a servant would only benefit them in this world, and the Hereafter is indeed better and more lasting. Alternatively, it may refer to what Fatimah (may Allah be pleased with her) specifically requested: that through these words of remembrance, she would receive strength that would enable her to perform her duties more effectively than any servant could. [16]

This guidance points to the importance of Dhikr (remembrance of Allah) as nourishment for the soul, much like food nourishes the body. 'Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) remarked that he never abandoned it, even on the intense night of the Battle of Siffin, as it became part of his nightly routine by divine guidance.

 

 

 

 

[1] Lisan al-Arab, by Ibn Manzur al-Ansari al-Ruwaifi al-Afriki (d. 711 AH), Dar Sader - Beirut, 3rd edition, 1414 AH, Vol. 14, p. 312.

[2] "It means her hands blistered." See: Mu'jam Maqayis al-Lughah, by Ahmad ibn Faris ibn Zakariya al-Qazwini al-Razi, Abu al-Husayn (d. 395 AH), edited by 'Abd al-Salam Muhammad Harun, Dar al-Fikr, 1399 AH - 1979 AD, Vol. 5, p. 298.

[3] Umdat al-Qari Sharh Sahih al-Bukhari, by Abu Muhammad Mahmud ibn Ahmad ibn Musa ibn Ahmad ibn Husayn al-Ghitabi al-Hanafi Badr al-Din al-Ayni (d. 855 AH), Dar Ihya al-Turath al-Arabi – Beirut, Vol. 21, p. 20.

[4] Qamm (verb): "To sweep." Lisan al-Arab, Vol. 12, p. 493.

[5] Sunan Abi Dawud, by Abu Dawud Sulayman ibn al-Ash'ath ibn Ishaq ibn Bishr ibn Shaddad ibn 'Amr al-Azdi al-Sijistani (d. 275 AH), edited by Muhammad Muhyi al-Din 'Abd al-Hamid, al-Maktabah al-'Asriyyah, Sidon – Beirut, Vol. 4, p. 315, Hadith No. 5063.

[6] Al-Jami' al-Musnad al-Sahih al-Mukhtasar min Umur Rasul Allah (may peace and blessings be upon him) wa Sunanihi wa Ayyamihi, also known as Sahih al-Bukhari, by Muhammad ibn Isma'il Abu 'Abdullah al-Bukhari al-Ju'fi, edited by Muhammad Zubayr ibn Nasir al-Nasir, Dar Tawq al-Najat (copy of the Sultan's edition with Muhammad Fuad 'Abd al-Baqi numbering), 1st edition, 1422 AH, Vol. 5, p. 29.

[7] Al-Bukhari, Sahih al-Bukhari, Vol. 7, p. 65, Book: "The Work of a Woman in Her Husband's House," Hadith No. 5361.

[8] Sanawat (verb) means "drawing water from the well in place of the animal." See: Fath al-Bari Sharh Sahih al-Bukhari, by Ahmad ibn Ali ibn Hajar Abu al-Fadl al-Asqalani al-Shafi'i, Dar al-Ma'rifah - Beirut, 1379 AH, Vol. 11, p. 119.

[9] Musnad al-Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal, by Abu 'Abdullah Ahmad ibn Muhammad ibn Hanbal ibn Hilal ibn Asad al-Shaybani (d. 241 AH), edited by Shu'ayb al-Arna'ut and 'Adil Murshid, et al., Mu'assasat al-Risalah, 1st edition, 1421 AH - 2001 AD, Vol. 2, p. 202, Hadith No. 838.

[10] Sharh Sahih al-Bukhari by Ibn Battal, by Abu al-Hasan Ali ibn Khalaf ibn 'Abd al-Malik (d. 449 AH), edited by Abu Tamim Yasir ibn Ibrahim, Maktabat al-Rushd - Saudi Arabia, Riyadh, 2nd edition, 1423 AH - 2003 AD, Vol. 7, p. 540.

[11] Fath al-Bari Sharh Sahih al-Bukhari, by Ahmad ibn Ali ibn Hajar Abu al-Fadl al-Asqalani al-Shafi'i, Dar al-Ma'rifah - Beirut, 1379 AH, numbered by Muhammad Fuad 'Abd al-Baqi, supervised and corrected by Muhibb al-Din al-Khatib, Vol. 11, p. 124.

[12] Ibid.

[13] Sharh Sahih al-Bukhari by Ibn Battal, previously cited, Vol. 7, p. 540.

[14] Ibid., Vol. 7, p. 540.

[15] Mirqat al-Mafatih Sharh Mishkat al-Masabih, by Ali ibn (Sultan) Muhammad, Abu al-Hasan Nur al-Din al-Mulla al-Harawi al-Qari (d. 1014 AH), Dar al-Fikr, Beirut – Lebanon, 1st edition, 1422 AH - 2002 AD, Vol. 4, p. 1658.

[16] Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi bi Sharh Jami' al-Tirmidhi, by Abu al-'Ala Muhammad 'Abd al-Rahman ibn 'Abd al-Rahim al-Mubarakfuri (d. 1353 AH), Dar al-Kutub al-'Ilmiyyah – Beirut, Vol. 9, p. 250.

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Summarized Fatawaa

I`m a mother of three orphans. Is it permissible for me to spend on myself from their salary, such as buying a Jilbab*?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
It is permissible to take a reasonable amount that is equal to your services to them. However, it is better that you don`t. The evidence on this is that Almighty Allah Says (What means): "Make trial of orphans until they reach the age of marriage; if then ye find sound judgment in them, release their property to them; but consume it not wastefully, nor in haste against their growing up. If the guardian is well-off, Let him claim no remuneration, but if he is poor, let him have for himself what is just and reasonable. When ye release their property to them, take witnesses in their presence: But all-sufficient is God in taking account." [An-Nisa`/6]. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.
 
* A full-length outer garment, traditionally covering the head and hands, worn in public by some Muslim women.

Is it permissible for a religious young Muslim woman to love a young man for Allah`s sakes?

Such love between the two sexes is from the devil`s evil suggestions, and a pure Muslim woman should beware of such a matter, and she shouldn`t mix with non-Mahrams (Marriageable ).

My eyebrows are very thick. Is it allowed to reduce them by cutting?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
 
It is allowed to reduce thick eyebrows by cutting them, however, it isn`t allowed to pluck or make very thin. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.

Is it incumbent on the fiancée to obey her fiancé?

When the woman settles in her husband`s house, it is incumbent on him to provide for her and it is incumbent on her to obey him. Before that, and if the marriage contract had been concluded, then she is lawfully his wife and thus she should abide by custom in treating him, but if the marriage contract hadn`t been concluded, then she should treat him as a non-Mahram (Marriageable ).