A Message to all Muslims Regarding Justice among Children
All perfect praise bt to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His blessings and peace be upon Prophet Mohammad, his family and companions.
This is an advice that we remind ourselves and all our fellow Muslims of, emphasizing the importance of fearing Allah both in private and in public, and the obligation to treat people with justice and kindness. Indeed, Allah, the Most Exalted, has commanded this in His Noble Book, saying: "God commands justice, the doing of good, and liberality to kith and kin, and He forbids all shameful deeds, and injustice and rebellion: He instructs you, that ye may receive admonition." (An-Nahl, 90).
And He, glorified be He, informed that He loves those who treat people with equity, as He said: "and be fair; For God loves those Who are fair (and just)." ( Al-Hujurat, 9).
Indeed, Allah, the Almighty, has also informed that He sent messengers and revealed scriptures to establish justice on earth among people. He said: "We sent aforetime our apostles with Clear Signs and sent down with them the Book and the Balance (of Right and Wrong), that men may stand forth in justice." (Al-Hadid, 25).
Undoubtedly, one of the foremost matters in which justice should be observed is justice among children. There should be no distinction between one child and another in terms of financial provision, gifts, or affection. The righteous predecessors, may Allah be pleased with them, used to emphasize justice even in the smallest matters. Justice in financial matters and in matters of worship takes precedence and is obligatory.
An-Nu'man b. Bashir told that his father brought him to God’s Messenger and said, "I have given this son of mine a slave.” He asked whether he had given all his children the same, and when he replied that he had not, he told him to take him back. A version reports him as asking, "Would you like them to show you equal filial piety?” When he replied that he would, he said, "Don’t do it then.” In a version he said that his father gave him a gift, but' Amra daughter of Rawaha said, "I shall not be satisfied till you call God's Messenger as witness.” So he went to him and said, "I have given my son from ‘Amra daughter of Rawaha a gift and she has ordered me to call you as witness, Messenger of God.” He asked whether he had given the rest of his children the same, and when he replied that he had not, he said, "Fear God and act equally with your children.” He said that he then returned and took back his gift. A version quotes him as saying, "I shall not be a witness to oppression.” {Transmitted by Bukhari & Muslim}.
And it is important to understand in this regard that justice entails considering the circumstances and conditions of the children. A poor child is not like a wealthy child, and the one in need of covering educational, medical or marriage expenses is not like the one who does not require such assistance. A child who has contributed to their parents and siblings through their efforts and work is not the same as someone who has not made such contributions or had the opportunity to support their family. Similarly, an obedient and righteous child is not like a disobedient and sinful child. The jurists have stated that justice in these scenarios and others does not prevent a parent from differentiating in their gifts and expenditures among their children. However, this should not be used as an excuse to differentiate among them without reason or necessity. Allah, glorified and exalted be He, knows what is within a person, is aware of their heart, and will indeed reward each soul according to its deeds on the Day of Judgment.
As for the children, it is incumbent upon them to fear Allah in their dealings with their siblings and to fulfill their rights in kindness, maintaining family ties, and showing affection. Allah does not expect anything from them except sincerity, loyalty, and love towards their siblings. Moreover, they should hold their sisters in even higher regard. Allah, exalted is He, said in a divine narration while addressing family ties: "Wouldn't you like me to mend relationships with those who mend relationships with you and sever ties with those who sever ties with you?" She responded, "Certainly, O Lord!" He then said, "That is for you." {Transmitted by Bukhari & Muslim}.
It is an act of kindness from the children towards their siblings and a form of sincere advice towards their parents not to accept gifts or favors from their father if they perceive any injustice or unfairness in it. They should also offer advice to their father to prevent him from engaging in what Allah has forbidden. If the father insists on giving a gift to one of them, it is recommended for the recipient to share it with their siblings. Ibn Qudamah, may Allah have mercy on him, stated, "There is no difference of opinion that it is recommended for the one who is given a gift to make it equal with what his brother received. That is why Abu Bakr and Umar, may Allah be pleased with them, ordered Qais bin Sa'd to return his father's gift to equally divide it, in order to treat fairly the child born after his father's death." (Al-Mughni, Vol. 5, Page 394).
In this way, everyone attains the pleasure of Allah, and Allah, the Exalted, safeguards families and households from disputes and discord. Each of us will stand before our Lord with hearts devoid of resentment or animosity towards any of our relatives or fellow Muslims.
We beseech Allah, the Most High, to grant us and all Muslims success in what He loves and is pleased with. And Allah, the Most High, knows best.