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Forbearance is the Basis for Dealing with Allah`s Creation
Author : Dr. Hassan Abu_Arqoub
Date Added : 04-01-2021

Forbearance is the Basis for Dealing with Allah`s Creation

 

 

A group of people thinks that sternness, mercilessness, anger and violence embody strength or manhood and they give a person control over different situations, however, this is incorrect. In principle, forbearance, leniency and kindness are the basis for dealing with others and they bring hearts and minds together. Allah The Almighty Says (What means): "It is part of the Mercy of Allah that thou dost deal gently with them Wert thou severe or harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about thee: so pass over (their faults), and ask for (Allah's) forgiveness for them; and consult them in affairs (of moment). Then, when thou hast taken a decision put thy trust in Allah. For Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)." [Al-Imran/159]. Thus, kindness, leniency and forbearance pass on to the next generations and love bears the fruit of righteousness, which is the golden key for the hearts of all people.

 

Therefore, in several narrations, Prophet (PBUH) urged Muslims to observe forbearance and kindness when dealing with others. This is in order for a Muslim to have self-control and become a successful role model in his relations with others: in-laws, children, neighbors, and colleagues…etcetera. 'Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "Whenever forbearance is added to something, it adorns it; and whenever it is withdrawn from something, it leaves it defective." [Moslim].

 

Moreover, 'Aisha (May Allah Be Pleased with her), the wife of Allah's Apostle (PBUH), reported that Allah's Messenger (PBUH) said: "'Aisha, verily Allah is Kind and He loves kindness and confers upon kindness which he does not confer upon severity and does not confer upon anything else besides it (kindness)." [Moslim].

 

In addition, Jarir b. 'Abdullah (May Allah Be Pleased with him) reported Allah's Apostle (PBUH) as saying:

"He who is deprived of tenderly feelings is in fact deprived of good and he who is deprived of tenderly feelings is in fact deprived of good." [Moslim].

 

Since violence usually stems from anger, our Prophet (PBUH) forbade it and commanded us not to get angry. He (PBUH) said: "On the authority of Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him): A man said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him): "Counsel me, so he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "Do not become angry." The man repeated [his request for counsel] several times, and [each time] he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "Do not become angry." [Al-Bukhari]. 

 

Furthermore, Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said: "The strong man is not the one who wrestles, but the strong man is in fact the one who controls himself in a fit of rage." [Al-Bukhari].

 

Kindness, leniency and forbearance are the bricks of healthy human relationships and each Muslim should maintain his different relations according to this scale. And Allah is the One Who Bestows all that is good. 

 

هذا المقال يعبر عن رأي كاتبه، ولا يعبر بالضرورة عن رأي دائرة الإفتاء العام

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Summarized Fatawaa

Is it permissible for a wife to refuse to go to bed with her husband (for sexual intercourse)?

It isn`t permissible for her to do so unless for a sound reason.

My husband has deprived me of visiting my family and is threatening to take my 7-month-old baby girl. Is he entitled to do so?

All perfect praise be to Allah the Lord of the Worlds. May His peace and blessings be upon our Prophet Mohammad and upon all his family and companions.
Your question is unclear, but family visitation is a legitimate right of yours. However, if he deprives you from this, try to convince him with wisdom and fair preaching. If there is a problem between you two, try to fix it. As for your daughter, you are most entitled to her custody anyway. Even if he divorced you, the girl remains under your care so long as you don`t get married. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.

Is wearing a cap permissible for boys, or girls?

All Perfect Praise is due to Allah, The Lord of The Worlds.

In principle, anything is permissible sol long as there is no Sharia evidence prohibiting it, thus wearing the cap by boys is permissible as long as it isn`t done in imitation of the disbelievers. Moreover, a Muslim woman should avoid all that which attracts the attention of men because whatever leads to the forbidden is forbidden. And Allah Knows Best.

1- A young man whose father and grandfather are dead. Unfortuntly, he passedaway leaving a mother, two sisters and a brother. Do his paternal uncles inherit him? 2- A man died leaving daughters, a wife, brothers, a mother or no mother. It is well known that the daughters inherit two thirds and the wife one eighth. To whom does the rest of the estate go and what is the evidence on that from the texts of Sharia?

All perfect praise be to Allah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad, sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
1- The full brother or the paternal half-sibling disinherits the paternal uncles. The paternal half-sibling takes one sixth and because they are from the Asabah (Male relatives on the father`s side) of the deceased they take the rest of the estate. The proof of this is that Ibn ‘Abbas (May Allah Be Pleased with them) reported God’s Messenger (PBUH) as saying: "Give the shares to those who are entitled to them, and what remains over goes to the nearest male heir." [Agreed upon]. In this case, nothing is left to them.
2- The brothers take the rest of the deceased`s estate and the full brother disinherits the paternal half-sibling, and the proof of this is the aforementioned narration. And Allah The Almighty Knows Best.