Is Iddah (waiting period) incumbent on an old woman whose husband had died?
Upon the death of the husband, Iddah is incumbent on the wife regardless of their age. And Allah Knows Best.
Do certain vaginal discharges and incontinence of urine nullify ablution, and should underwear be changed?
A person afflicted with constant impurity due to urinary incontinence and vaginal discharges is obliged to make ablution for every obligatory prayer when its time is due, and after removing Najaasah (impurity), and wearing a clean diaper. He/she is obliged to pray immediately even if the impurity is being released, and he/she is obliged to remake ablution, and the aforementioned for every obligatory prayer.
Is it permissible for the young woman to turn the suitor down if she had no feelings for him?
Yes, it is permissible for her to do so.
Where should a woman who is led by her husband in prayer stand?
All perfect praise be to Allah The Lord of The Worlds It is from Sunnah (Prophetic tradition) that she stands behind him. And Allah Knows Best.