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Parenting Training Skills
Author : Dr. Ahmad Al-Harasees
Date Added : 01-09-2022

Parenting Training Skills

 

 

Ibn 'Umar (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Prophet (PBUH) said: "All of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects, the man is a guardian of his family, the woman is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for your subjects." [Agreed upon], hence the duty of parents for the care and education of their children. Nowadays, the need for training parents on parenting skills has increased to enable them to create a physically, intellectually, and spiritually integrated and balanced generation. Traditional upbringing and simulating the methods of our fathers and mothers are not suitable for this time and generation because of the changes that society has undergone at all levels. These changes have influenced the structure of the family and the upbringing patterns, leading parents to puzzle over simulating the strict parenting style on the one hand and the modern style that rests on understanding the needs and desires on the other.

It must be admitted that the majority of today`s generation is completely aware of its rights and doesn`t believe in the old parenting style applied to them. All these changes and the information revolution compel parents to change their methods of upbringing their children to achieve the desired objective.

 

Here, I will mention some parenting skills that should be known and activated in educational administration.

1- Learning the stages of child`s development as well as his/her behavior and needs during them.

2- Considering the motivation of children an observable lifestyle.

3- Learning effective positive methods for handling wrong behavior.

4- Using effective methods for communicating with the children.

 

Educators are aware of all these changes, so it is imperative to deal with the modern educational methods. Someone once said: "Teach your children how to survive in times different from those you have experienced." Passage of time, events, developments, and change in generation require educators to employ flexibility in dealing with children. It was also said: "People are the product of their era, not that of their fathers`." Obviously, these saying stress the previous concept.

Here, some may ask: "Does keeping abreast with changes an

 

 

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Summarized Fatawaa

What is the ruling on a mother giving the Zakat of her wealth to her children?

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
 
It is permissible for a mother to give her children from the Zakat if they are among those who are eligible for it—such as being poor (Fuqara), possessing no wealth, and not being sufficiently provided for by the maintenance (Nafaqah) of others. This is based on the statement of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ regarding Zaynab, the wife of 'Abdullah ibn Mas'ud (may Allah be pleased with them both): (Your husband and your children are the most deserving of those upon whom you spend in charity) [Narrated by Al-Bukhari].
 
It is stated in [Al-Hawi al-Kabir, Vol. 8/P.537]: 'As for the wife, it is permissible for her to pay her Zakat to her husband from all the designated shares... Our evidence is the generality of the saying of Allah the Almighty: "Zakat expenditures are only for the poor and for the needy", and the Hadith of Abu Hurairah that the Prophet ﷺ said to Zaynab, the wife of 'Abdullah ibn Mas'ud: (Your husband and your children are the most deserving of those upon whom you spend), and this is taken in its general sense.' And Allah the Exalted knows best.

Is the one offering the sacrifice liable if its meat spoils?

Praise be to Allah, and prayers and peace be upon our Master the Messenger of Allah.
 
If the meat (of the sacrifice) spoils due to the negligence of the one offering the sacrifice in preserving it, or due to improper storage, then he is liable to compensate for the portion due to the poor (which is estimated as half a kilogram of meat). If the sacrifice was a vowed (mandatory) one, then he is liable for all of it.
 
However, if he was not negligent, then there is no liability upon him, because its ruling is the ruling of a trust (like an item left in someone's care). And Allah Almighty knows best.

Should a person feel pleased, or have a virtuous vision after offering Istikhara (guidance prayer) in order to do what he/she had offered it for?

The result of the Istikhaarah is not necessarily that a person sees something (in his dream), or feels pleased, but the most important result of the Istikhaarah is whether a person is enabled to do a given matter or not.

How is the meat of the 'aqīqah to be distributed?

All praise is due to Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon our Master, the Messenger of Allah.
If the 'aqīqah is a recommended one (mandūbah), it is obligatory to give some portion of it in charity to the poor — even if the amount is small — with the minimum being approximately half a kilogram of meat.
The most preferable manner of distribution is to divide it into three equal portions, as with the uḍḥiyyah:
 
One third for the guardian and his household to eat from
One third to be given in charity to the poor
One third to be gifted to friends and neighbours, even if they are wealthy
 
It is furthermore more preferable to send the food to the poor already cooked, rather than inviting them to come and eat. And Allah Almighty knows best.

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